Thursday, January 26, 2012

Bliss

A great friend always says to follow your own bliss. Hes motivated countless people with this. Being in our house with the comforting energy here makes me feel like Ive lived here for years. Thinking of all the things I am going to do over the next few months gives me a sense of inner happiness and excitement that I KNOW I'm following my bliss. Ive been taking time recently to try and figure out who I am beyond being a mother and wife. Having some sense of my own identity. I'm a Pinterest addict and I was looking over my "Just Me" board with some of my favorite things that aren't wife, mommy, or house related. Looking at these little pictures and seeing who I am from a 3rd party point of view I realized I already know who I am and I actually like myself! Maybe not love myself yet but liking myself is a huge step for me. I liked what the pictures represented for me. I may not be able to pinpoint who I am with one word or phrase but that's ok, I'm a little nerdy, bad grammar annoys me especially when its on purpose, I'm a hippie, I have a temper but I try to fight my impatience and temper to be a peaceful parent to my children. I so desperately wanted a girl my whole life thinking I would be a great mom to a girl and thought I hadn't gotten to have her yet because there were things I needed to change but realized I'm just better suited to be a mom to boys. I terrified to have 3 boys but excited too. I'm physically low maintenance and laid back but emotionally high maintenance and I'm glad I found my soul mate that knows, understand and even appreciates that about me. I want to be more assertive but I care more than I should. I'm that girl in the maxi skirt and a thousand bracelets. I'm going to garden, compost, line dry clothes to save energy, make my own soaps, shaving cream, shampoo and cleaning supplies. Being creative, cooking, making my house a home IS my bliss. That's who I am. I'm sure it will change and evolve but for now I'm happy.